


Weird human rituals

by Melime



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Accidental Marriage, F/F, Silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-01
Updated: 2016-03-01
Packaged: 2018-05-24 01:49:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 435
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6137153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Melime/pseuds/Melime
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Somehow, they end up married.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Weird human rituals

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Português brasileiro available: [Rituais humanos estranhos](https://archiveofourown.org/works/6137158) by [Melime GreenLeaf (Melime)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Melime/pseuds/Melime%20GreenLeaf)



> Written for the [femtropebingo](http://femtropebingo.tumblr.com/), accidental marriage. Standalone, but with the same Inquisitor as [Facing the mirror](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4752455) and [Mixed Signals](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4810850).

“And how exactly did this happen?” Josephine asked in a tired voice. Being the ambassador for the Inquisition when their dear Lady Inquisitor had less manners than a rabid mabari and negative amounts of social awareness was cutting decades of her life expectancy.

“In my defense, at first, I wasn’t aware it was a wedding.”

“What did you think it was?”

Ellana shrugged. “I don’t know. Humans love weird rituals, and I’d never seen a human wedding before.”

Josephine thought about pointing out that she never heard anything about Dalish weddings being drastically different, but she assumed Ellana wouldn’t have a clue about that, humans weren’t the only ones she had trouble understanding. “Cassandra, do you have something to contribute?”

Cassandra, who had her lowered head hid under her palm, just shook her head.

Josephine sighed. “Why would you even invade that mansion?”

“I thought I saw a demon.”

“It was a nug,” Cassandra said, still hiding her face.

“It looked like a demon.”

“And why did you decide to attack the groom?”

“I thought the demon had turned into him. He kinda looked like a demon. And he’ll be fine, it was barely a scratch, there wasn’t even enough blood for him to pass out.”

Josephine closed her eyes and breathed deeply. “Do I even want to know how did you go from incapacitating the groom to deciding to get married?”

“I didn’t know it was a wedding! They kept complaining they couldn’t go along with the ceremony, so I offered to take his place, and the bride was fine with that, she said she admired the Inquisition.”

“And that was when Cassandra decided to intervene?”

“I was just trying to stop this nonsense wedding.”

“By marrying our Lady Inquisitor yourself?”

“Hey, by then I still didn’t know what was happening, it’s all Cassandra’s fault!”

“You were the one that said we should get married!”

“No, I said you should stay in the bride’s place if you wanted to! I didn’t know it was a wedding!”

Josephine hit her hands on the table, getting up. “That’s enough. I’ll leave you alone to discuss it, but I’ll have you know that I’m disappointed with both of you. Especially you, Cassandra, you should know better than to follow the Inquisitor’s lead in any matter that isn’t a battle. Now I’ll have to find a way to solve the conflict you created by ruining the wedding of the season and by not inviting any of our allies to the Inquisitor’s wedding.”

Josephine left, locking the door behind her, wondering if it was too late to change careers.


End file.
